Long time, no post

I've been a rather busy dog for the past few months, so sorry about the lack of posting. I spent a few days with my most awesomest Auntie Paula, with her dogs, Bus and Marlin. We had a blast. There are also these small creatures in her house that she hides in a back room. I am obsessed with them, but Paula will not let me play with them or eat them or even see them. But I know they are there. They are called Thurman and Merman, and, well, I want to have them for lunch sometime. I mean meet them, meet them for lunch. All friendly like. Really.

Back here at my regular home, I've become increasingly plagued by the various kitties who live in my neighborhood. There are two grey kittens who live across the street, and I swear, they come outside and taunt me. They sun themselves RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME from the other side of the fence. They frolic and play. They are making me crazy. SO crazy, that recently, I have taken to going into the garden and eating dirt. Bridget really really really hates this and tries to stop me, so I like to run away, but running through the garden, making dog prints and a general mess. She is totally fed up with me. It's awesome.

So recently, I sat down with the newest member of our household to conduct a dog-to-baby interview. Here we are in the garden, getting to know each other:

I thought I would share my findings so far, in the interest of informing other dogs of what these creatures are really like. It turns out, they're not all bad. They are A LOT bad, but sometimes, they are not entirely bad. Here we go:

Carter: I see you have a lot of cool, squeaky, chewy toys. Can I borrow some of them?
Lucy: Sure!
Carter: Thanks! Nom!
Carter: So, uh, I think you're spoiled.
Lucy: Spoiled? What's that?
Carter: The humans, they carry you around everywhere. I mean EVERYWHERE. Like, you don't have to walk at all.
Lucy: Yeah, but they go wherever THEY want to go. I don't get to decide. But someday, I will.
Carter: You get to go UPSTAIRS. I NEVER EVER EVER get to go upstairs. And when I try, I get yelled at. What is upstairs? Is it like filled with chew toys? Is there beef jerky everywhere? You MUST tell me!
Lucy: No way, dude, you DON'T want to go up there. I have to SLEEP when I go up there! They put me in a CAGE in a DARK ROOM. It is LAME upstairs.
Carter: I dunno, the sleeping part doesn't sound so bad. But a cage? A cage you say? Really?
Lucy: It's a cage. I don't care if they call it a "crib." The cribs on MTV don't look like that. It's a baby cage.
Carter: Still, you're so lucky! They feed you from a bottle! And they do that ALL THE TIME! I only get fed twice a day! You get fed, like ten times a day and even IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT! I know! I hear you scream, and then they give you a bottle! When I bark, I don't even get a treat!
Lucy: OK, tell ya what. When I get myself mobile, my first order of business will be to get you more food. Promise.
Carter: Really? OK. That sounds good. I don't want bottles though. I want, like steak.
Lucy: What's steak?
Carter: Harumph. We'll work on it. But to get back to the questions, what's with all the screaming? I mean, you're really loud. REALLY REALLY LOUD. And yet, so small. You're totally smaller than me. But so much louder. What's up with that?
Lucy: Why wouldn't I be loud? I mean, what's the point of being quiet?
Carter: I disapprove of such behavior, and I ask you, I beseech you, please stop with all the screaming.
Lucy: I'll take it under advisement. No promises.
Carter: Well, I think we've covered more than enough for one interview session. I think I need to take a nap. I hope we can continue to have a productive dialogue in the interest of improved living conditions for both babies and dogs in this household. Agreed?
Lucy: Agreed.

I'm a Patient Dog

Things are OK here in my world. Lately I've been doing a lot of raiding -- whether of the kitchen or of our guests' bags. As you can see in the photo above, I've hoarded not only my toys in my bed, but also an empty breadcrumb container that I grabbed from the trash (yes, it was empty when I got it, no, my people did not have the pleasure of seeing me get my head stuck in it, although they dearly wish they had). I've been chewing at various plastic bags that I think once held food, too. I've also been trying to get as much time on the couch as possible. I'm allowed to sit there when there are human sitting there and they invite me up. But it's also very easy for me to invite myself up when no one is around. I do this all the time. Jake and Bridget are always telling me to scoot. I don't mind, but I don't really understand their policy of couch protectionism. Sigh.

Super-Dog Sunday!

Today Jake and Bridget had some people over to watch some football game, and here's what I found out: When there are other people here, it is WAY easy for me to snag food. I got to eat some cornbread off Jake's plate, and later on, I ate ICE CREAM!! It was awesome. It was my first major sporting event, and I've decided that football is awesome. The chips, the chili, the not well-guarded treats! Woo hoo!
In case you're wondering, I'm rooting for the underdog. It's just my nature.

Year of the Dog

So I've been living here with Jake and Bridget for over a year now! They tell me that it was my arrival anniversary on January 24th! It has been an eventful year. Sorry I haven't been able to post lately, but it seems every time I sit down to write, Lucy needs something, so, as a helpful dog, I can't just blog all the time. Sigh.

Yesterday I went to the vet and got a lot of shots, but I was a good good dog. Also, I got a totally clean bill of health, and they rated my body a 5 out of 5!! Seriously!!! I am totally buff. Also, the vet estimates that I am only about 5 years old, not 9 like Jake and Bridget thought. So we're all very excited to realize that I'm such a young, hip dog.

Things are good here in Lowell.

Dog Bless Us, Everyone!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

This is my first Christmas with Jake and Bridget (and Lucy) and I've had a pretty awesome day. I got a special meal of pheasant for dogs! It came out of a can and I was really excited about it, even though Bridget said she thought it looked gross. What does she know?

The peoples cooked bacon, and I got a small snack of it -- I wanted more, because the whole house smelled like bacon! MMMmmmmm.

Santa also brought me a present. It was kinda hard to open with my paws, but I managed (with some help from Bridget). It had a bunch of treats in it and a new squeaky toy! It's a small mallard duck and I like it a lot!




I am also getting along pretty well with this Lucy character who lives here now. Sometimes I check on her for the peoples, just to make sure she's OK. I'm also being increasingly protective -- I bark like mad when the postman or the UPS man or the FedEx man comes to the door. Just making sure they know that just because they bring me packages, I don't have to trust them!

I'm a good dog.

The Times, they are a changin'

So things have been crazy here at my house. Jake and Bridget sent me away, and then brought me back, where I met Bridget's Mom, who took care of me for a few days. We got along OK, but she kept getting up REALLY early and encouraging me to go outside. She didn't get that I am a lazy dog, and that I like to wait until late morning to go outside. But she took good care of me, keeping me fed. I think by the end of her visit, she was a member of the Carter fan club, even if she won't admit it.

While she was here, I got another haircut. Also, the people brought a tree into the house! I tell you, it's a crazy mixed up world!

Then Bridget and Jake finally came back home. And they brought with them this creature they call "the Baby" or "Lucy." At first, I was really really really upset, because this creature makes A LOT of noise. I felt the need to point at the location of the baby, and to whine and cry when she would cry. Then Jake started giving me treats whenever this happened, which was awesome. Eventually, he stopped doing that, and I have chilled out, but still, that creature is VERY LOUD.

I have continued to make regular raids on the kitchen, as well as any bags that are left within reach of my nose. I made multiple attempts to grab some English muffins from the kitchen, but only got an empty box. I also found myself an entire pack of red licorice in Jessamy's bag (that was awesome! I never even knew I liked red licorice! YUM!).

Additionally, the weather around here has been nuts, with all this snow and ice around. It's rather hard on my poor paws, so I often have to get some help from Jake to get the snow out from between my toes, and to warm me up after our walks. My bed is now located next to a radiator, so I stay nice and toasty while I'm indoors.

That's all for now. I am hoping that Santa will bring me some nice new treats for Christmas. And I hope all my readers get their Christmas wishes, too!

Change is in the air

So as you can see from yet another new position for my personal couch, things have been a little weird around here lately. The humans are moving furniture around and cleaning and getting all kinds of weird new stuff. Bridget has been lying on the futon a lot, and when she does this, I get to sit there too, which is awesome. I've been very snuggly, and she says this is being a good helper.

Tonight I get to go to Aunt Paula's, which of course, will be awesome. But I get the sense that things are going to be different somehow when I get back. I wonder what this November Surprise is going to be.